Causes of Losing Interest in Sex & Tips to Deal With It

Losing interest in sex or low libido is commonly faced by many but not all may talk about it. However, it can affect your health, life and relationships in many ways and hence needs to be addressed in time. This article deals with problems of poor sex drive and its causes, along with some effective tips to deal with it.

In medical terms, losing interest in sex is also known as hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD). Lack of sexual desire is more common in women than in men. Around 15-16 % of men are affected by this but for women, the numbers are more widespread. Losing interest in sex may be related to many causes, medical conditions and some medications also. It is necessary to know the causes of losing interest in sex and some effective tips to deal with it.

Losing interest in sex can bring in relationship problems and may lead to stress thus ultimately resulting in depression. Most of the couples going through this problem find their relationship dull and after a certain period of time it becomes one of the reasons of their separation. Low libido can also be the reason for losing interest in your partner and this creates distance in a relationship. Many people hate their lives because of their low sex drive, whereas some may get used to it. Many get frustrated, which gives rise to unwanted fights and misunderstandings between their partners. But you need not suffer from it, as there are effective solutions to handle the problem. To manage losing interest in sex, it is important to trace the causes, detect the symptoms and learn effective tips to deal with it.

Causes of Losing Interest in Sex & Tips to Deal With It

Causes of Losing Interest in Sex

The causes of losing interest in sex include the following:

Testosterone Level

Low testosterone level is one of the major causes of losing interest in sex. This hormone is responsible for stimulation of sperm production. When the levels fall under 300 to 350 nanograms per decilitre it is considered as low sex drive. In women, the levels of testosterone increases in their mid-twenties but this level drops remarkably during menopause.


Peer pressure, job stress and certain images regarding the sexuality in the media also tends to influence the sexual desire. Stress plays an important role that interrupts your hormone level and is one of the major causes of losing interest in sex. Studies state that stress itself has a direct effect on one’s sexual life. Relationship problems too can also be included as the causes of losing interest in sex.

Poor Self Esteem

Poor body image and low self-esteem can also stand out as one of the important causes of losing interest in sex.

Medical Conditions

Diseases like arthritis, cancer, diabetes, coronary artery disease and some neurological diseases may decrease your interest for sex. Medical conditions that cause pain, fear or discomfort too are common causes of losing interest in sex.


Alcohol, smoking and drugs too are a cause of losing interest in sex. A glass of wine might be able to make you feel light and amorous but too much of alcohol consumption affects your sexual drive. The same goes with street drugs, while excessive smoking lowers the rate of blood flow which dampens the arousal for sex.

Hormonal Changes

During menopause, the level of estrogen drops down vigorously which may lead to decreased desire for sex in women. Facing difficulty with orgasms, gynecological problems in women or experiencing pain during intercourse can also be the cause of losing interest in sex.


Fatigue after a prolonged illness can play a vital role in low sex drive. Surgery’s related to the genital tract or breasts too are some of the important causes of losing interest in sex.

Mental Trauma

Those, who have been physically or sexually abused in their past are most likely to have low sex drive. These encounters affect the mental as well as physical health which decreases their interest for sex.


Relationship issues are one of the most significant causes of low sex drive. Problems with your relationship can also create problems with your sex drive. Lack of connection, trust issues, lack of communication of sexual needs and preferences and continuous fights can be the major causes of low sex drive.


Depression can change everything in a person’s life including sex. Also low sex drive is one of the side effect of antidepressants.

Sleep Disorders

Problems while sleeping can also decrease your interest for sex. According to a study men with Obstructive Sleep Apnea (OSA) have lower testosterone levels which leads to a decrease in libido. This is faced by mostly older men who do not get healthy sleep.


Men notice a change in their sex drive around ages 60-65. The testosterone level, which is responsible for all your sex related activities are highest when they are at their late teens. Once you grow old, you may have problems with orgasms and might face difficulties in getting aroused for sex.

Tips to Deal With Losing Interest in Sex

Losing interest in sex is related to many problems and you need to identify those that apply in your case. The most effective ways to deal with it are based on correcting the problem. Effective tips for men, to deal with issues of losing interest in sex include,

Men with measurably low amounts of testosterone can take testosterone supplements. These are one of the most effective tips to deal with loss of interest in sex, particularly, when the hormone levels are low. 25% of the men suffering from this go for weekly testosterone shots but most of them are more likely to opt for gel formulations which are applied directly to the skin of the chest, abdomen or shoulders.

Low dopamine level can be increased with dopamine increasing drugs but this treatment is not yet approved and also has risks.

Exercise and Lifestyle Changes Can Help You Overcome The Problem of Losing Interest in Sex

  • It is necessary to mention the role of regular exercises and healthy lifestyle in the tips to deal with losing interest in sex. Exercising can be one of the biggest keys for unlocking the closed doors of enjoying sex again in their lives. It may also beat erectile dysfunction. The following exercises might boost sex in your life again.
  • Push-ups – if you want to do just one exercise, this is the best one for you. Start with the basic push-ups aiming for 3 to 4 sets of 15 to 20 repetitions.
  • Abs – Abdominal muscles are really important during sex. So, to get better results you can go for the different ab exercises like crunches.
  • Torso side bends and twists – This maybe a bit difficult than the others but the effort would be totally worth it as torso side bends and twists provides the stamina you lack and also keeps your upper body strong.
  • Pushing and pulling: Rowing is one of the best push and pull exercise which might be great to enhance your performance.
  • If these exercises aren’t your thing to do, you have plenty of other kind of workouts available so that you could finally say goodbye to the low sex drive. Also, go for regular walking or jogging to boost your endurance.
  • Regular exercise including strength training and aerobics helps to increase your stamina and also improves your body image and thus boosts your low sex drive. This is one of the effective tips to deal with losing interest in sex in both men and women.
  • Healthy lifestyle choices may lead to improvement in your sex life. Dietary tips to deal with losing interest in sex mainly suggest you to get proper sleep, have a balanced diet and get involved in different activities which gives you pleasure and make you feel alive.
  • If you’re a smoker, it’s time to quit smoking. This is one of the most effective tips to deal with sex problems. By doing so, you’ll allow a better flow of blood in your body which is very important for the arousal of sex.
  • Consumption of alcohol and other types of drugs should be avoided. If the amount of testosterone is low, testosterone replacement therapy may be considered.
  • If your current medications are affecting your sex drive, seek medical advice to know their effects on your sex drive. Correcting medical conditions or medicines causing sexual problems, are an important tip to deal with low sex drive.

Emotional Wellbeing

Psychological and sex therapies offer specific techniques and strategies to enjoy sex again. But these therapies basically psychological counseling based on sexual issues but not psychotherapy. These offer effective tips to deal with low sex drive in cases of depression, anxiety, relations and emotional problems or chronic medical problems.

Connecting in an honest and open way to your partner may build that emotional connection which can lead to better sex. It is important that you talk about sex to your partners and try knowing each other’s likes and dislikes which will help to build intimacy and will lead to great sex.

If you can find out the right ways to overcome your stress and daily hassle, you might just be able to boost your low sex dive. Having a positive approach in your life helps a lot to get over stress. Besides, you should have proper feeding habits as well which provide better nutrition and will also help you to boost your sex drive.

Give intimacy a chance. Intimacy can bring you and your partner a lot closer and will also improve your sex drive. Scheduling sex is always boring so sit back and let intimacy do its job and bring back your sex life.

Try to spice things up between you and your partner. Trying out different things and positions may increase the urge and also can rekindle your sexual sizzle. You can try different locations, asking your partner to spend more time on foreplay will do just the right thing to bring back your sex drive.

Women should stop being worried about discussing about their sex related problems to their partners. Here is where you need to build a healthy relationship with each other in order to sort them out in an easier way. If your doctor is not comfortable with you talking about your low sex drive feel free to see another doctor or a counsellor and act accordingly.

Effective tips to deal with losing interest in sex, for women, includes

  • For vaginal dryness, which is the cause of painful sex and low sex drive, estrogen skin creams can be used. Generally the estrogen level falls due to menopause or breast feeding.
  • Women having difficulty in getting aroused or reaching their orgasms are often prescribed with erectile dysfunction drugs. This drug boosts the flow of blood to the genitals.

Also Read:

Pramod Kerkar, M.D., FFARCSI, DA
Pramod Kerkar, M.D., FFARCSI, DA
Written, Edited or Reviewed By: Pramod Kerkar, M.D., FFARCSI, DA Pain Assist Inc. This article does not provide medical advice. See disclaimer
Last Modified On:October 31, 2022

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